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Erin Lee
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When I'm Dead: Beware of Picket Fences Kindle Edition

by Erin Lee (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.6 out of 5 stars 27 ratings
Violet Hoffman is a planner. She’s had more than enough time—especially on holidays—to think this through. There’s really no point in turning back. Now, armed with a plan, Violet only needs to pull the trigger. She runs through her list of essentials: Motel room, check. Bottle of pills, check. Razor blades, check. Purpose, check. Knife? Yup. Voice ready to be heard. Got it. Revenge, coming right up.

Violet is ready. After all, she decides, everyone is born for a reason. For most of her life, she’s been different. Since she was nine years old, she’s carried a secret that made it impossible for her to be normal. For a decade, she’s been torn between loyalties and healing. But now, finally an adult, Violet can let it all out. And it isn’t going to be pretty. But then again, being ‘pretty’ and ‘special’ really aren’t what they’re cracked up to be.

When I’m Dead is the story of an eighteen-year-old abuse victim alienated by her family. Ignored by a faulty system and shuffled from placement to placement, Violet is finally old enough to be heard. Sometimes, the best messages are given without words. And Violet’s always been a person of action. Where will Violet’s plan and actions take her? Will she finally get her message across? What will they think of her, when she’s dead? Will they even notice?
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  1. Print length
    226 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    August 8, 2016
  4. File size
    594 KB
  5. Page Flip
    Enabled
  6. Word Wise
    Enabled
  7. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Erin Lee is a freelance writer and therapist chasing a crazy dream one crazy story at a time. She lives with her family in southern New Hampshire. She is the author of Crazy Like Me, a novel published in 2015 by Savant Books and Publications, LLC, reprinted for ebook as Her Kinda Crazy in 2016, Wave to Papa, 2015, by Limitless Publishing and Nine Lives (2016). She's also the author of Alters and Host, the first books in the Lola, Party of Eight series. Lately, she spends her days working on upcoming novels Merge, Her Name Was Sam, Love Like Crazy, and 99 Bottles. Lee has published numerous magazine articles, particularly on the topic of mental illness. She recently contributed to the Anonymous anthology, in support of the Semi-Colon Project with her short story "One Good Reason." Her short story psychological thriller, "Rest in Peace?" is featured in Limitless' Thirteen anthology in support of mental wellness. She holds a master's degree in psychology and works with at-risk families and as a court appointed special advocate.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B01H5KGNUS
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ August 8, 2016
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 594 KB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 226 pages
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 out of 5 stars 27 ratings

About the author

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Erin Lee

Erin Lee

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FOLLOW ERIN LEE ON #AuthorTube ON THE CRAZY TRAIN HERE:

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USA Today Bestselling Author Erin Lee is a dark fiction/reality author and therapist chasing a crazy dream one crazy story at a time. She is the author of more than sixty books and founder of Crazy Ink Publishing, LLC.

Her Diary of a Serial Killer Series is an international bestselling series as is the Moving On Series that she co-wrote with Chelsi Davis. She is also the author of the award-winning Circus Freak Series - soon to be a full length novel called Circus Freaks. Upcoming titles include Lusus Naturae, Pretty Bones and Boned.

Lee holds a master’s degree in psychology and works with at-risk families and as a court appointed special advocate. She writes reality-based fiction under the pen name EL George. When she isn’t busy dissecting the human experience, she enjoys escaping from reality through reading and spending time with her muses and canine companions —Thomas the Terrier and Milo Muse. To her, laughter is the best medicine of all.

Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
27 global ratings

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Top reviews from the United States

  • Kindle Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic in site to the feeling of children of abuse.
    Reviewed in the United States on July 15, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Author Erin Lee wrote 'When I'm Dead' from the child's point of view. Violet is a child with a big secret that could tear her family apart. Violet made up a friend in her head named Charlotte to save her when things got bad. When the secret was out Violet was the one that suffered. The system let her down. The staff that was over worked did their best to help but it wasn't enough. Not until Violet went to a group home did she let her hard down to make a friend. But that was short lived. Violet's life was destroyed by her secret she listed everything and everyone in her life, family included. When faced with the choice of her daughter or her husband, Violet's mother chose her father. Violet's thoughts of 'The reason I was born' were very moving. Erin Lee made you stop and think about the system, the children and the families of abuse.
    Through the night Violet thinks about what she has lived through. There she sat in a cheap motel with several different ways to end her suffering. But, Violet wakes up the next morning and realized that she would be giving everyone what they wanted but, not what she wanted. She does have something to live for and it's herself. The book When I'm Dead is another example of Erin Lee's fantastic writing of the human psyche.
    One person found this helpful
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  • fran
    4.0 out of 5 stars A fair and balanced story of the positives and negatives of the way child abuse victims are treated
    Reviewed in the United States on November 6, 2016
    Verified Purchase
    A good book about the way the system and families treat kids who come forward with claims of abuse. I also liked the positive way the foster care system was treated, with the positive caregivers being emphasized.
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  • Sharon Holland
    5.0 out of 5 stars Listen to the Phoenixes of the world
    Reviewed in the United States on July 19, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Yes, I used the term Phoenix. It's the best way to describe the main character in this story. Abuse comes in many forms. I for one have endured physical and mental abuse, so I can somewhat relate to Violet. The hiding what is happening and then the people who should believe, turning away from you, when needed the most. There are many types of evil in the world!! Ignoring them DOES NOT make them to away! Some are VERY good at hiding that evil. Be the person that has their blinders off. Be the one that stops it. Be the voice for those that are afraid to use theirs!
    One person found this helpful
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  • Beans
    5.0 out of 5 stars Wow
    Reviewed in the United States on July 30, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    I don't even know where to begin with my review. This subject is so heartbreaking. In my field of work, I see so many kids that are left to wander alone and I think, wow, you're blessed with beautiful children and you don't give a crap about if they make it to or from the restroom safely. So many kids are unwanted, just an afterthought, and so many are abused, its so sad. This book is an amazing journey through an abused child's life. This author really opens your mind to what kids go through by making you feel everything this child endured.
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  • AlmaSanchez75
    5.0 out of 5 stars Loved this book!
    Reviewed in the United States on July 30, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    I loved this book so much, although some parts of it were hard to read thru and try to rationalize because of the story and what was happening. I truly think this book is a must read for everyone because it is a topic that is not talked about but should because this happens a lot of kids without anyone finding out and it shouldn't be happening at all. And I can't wait to read more of this author's books!
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  • SHELBY
    5.0 out of 5 stars Pass the tissue...
    Reviewed in the United States on April 14, 2018
    Verified Purchase
    Dang it, Erin! Dang it!

    Kleenex cannot produce enough boxes to keep up with your written stories. It is going to take a lifetime to piece my heart back together.

    Another book with such a deep message that can help so many.

    Keep writing, Author Lee. Be the voice and the echo!
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  • Donna Owens
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fabulous book
    Reviewed in the United States on September 18, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    I so LOVED this book
    I was an emotional wreck
    This was truly written by a very talented author and Erin Lee is now in my top 5 favorite author's that I love and will continue to read
    ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
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  • Kayla
    5.0 out of 5 stars This story sticks with you and its a must-read!
    Reviewed in the United States on August 10, 2016
    When I first heard about this book, I had to spend some time thinking about whether or not I wanted to read it. The synopsis lets you know this isn't going to be winning any awards for cheerfulness and there is no love story here. Only heartbreak. That said, I recently turned 32 and I had decided to make 32 the year of branching out. Nothing insane, but just saying yes where maybe my instinct would be to say no.

    I feel like this book eviscerated me. I honestly felt like my insides turned raw and muddy from reading Violet's story. This story is told from Violet's perspective, starting way back when she was little. It was heartbreaking to hear this little girl, who most adults would just dismiss, be so intelligent and know full well what is going on. I know we hear about these things happening in the news, in terms of child abuse and molestation, but you always hear the glossed over, legal version of events. Seeing Violet at such a young age knowing that she shouldn't have someone spend the night because she needs to protect them was heartbreaking.

    When things finally start to change, I couldn't tell if I felt worse for Violet or better. A recurring theme that kept going through my mind was that how can a child comprehend this and make sense of it all. I mean, it just seemed so incredibly unfair to this poor girl, who truly did nothing wrong get punished over and over and over again by the system.

    I don't want to give away this story so I don't want to say much more. But my honest feeling is that this book should absolutely be required reading for foster parents, guidance counselors, government leaders, attorneys, judges, anyone in family law; and the list could go on and on. Hearing this experience from the child's point of view was mind-blowing and I have not been able to stop thinking about it since I finished the book.
    2 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Fraser
    5.0 out of 5 stars Although this title confronts a painful and not often talked about subject the author manages ...
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 28, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    This book broke me. The story of violet resonated so deeply with me I cried through most of it. The book is written from the victims point of view and It is in my opinion, a stark and honest account. It still amazes me with every book I read by Ms Lee, how well she captures the subject matter. Although this title confronts a painful and not often talked about subject the author manages to gently take you down this path. Is it a happy book? No. Is it an important one?YES.
    It is a very well thought out, well written story that needs to be read.
    Another amazing read by an author who takes subjects most of us dare not go near and brings them into the light. (
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